girl growing

and a space for her to play in

Thursday, August 03, 2006

visit the pain

i got a new tattoo the other night. i had just gotten my wisdom teeth out and i decided that any pain was better than the one in my mouth. for some reason, the crazy medicine they gave me simply didn't agree with my body, and for a few days i was throwing up blood and fainting. my moms a trooper though and she kept me alive, but i gotta tell ya...i was way not cute. so my friend kevin and i decided we should finally go ahead and get these tattoos we'd be talking about getting all summer. i'm proud of him. he took the pain like a champ.

so everyone's asking me why i put 'hope'. mostly just because i think it's a pretty word and it looks cute...but there's always more than that. i got it because i think that out of all the words and passages and ideas that the bible conveys this is the one that remains with me the most.

i have issues with memorizing bible verses. i don't know why and i don't know if my feelings toward the activity will change, but at present i just plain don't like it. i don't want to be one of those kids who wakes up every morning and repeats a verse in my head so many times that all that remains is repetition. i want to know what's in the bible and where i can find it, but i don't want to turn it into a chore. who knows...maybe that's silly. i do have a favorite passage though and it's kinda why i got the tatt...

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

i like it.

there's a lot to unpack with that verse and much of it i'm still debating on in my little juli mind. i have had many conversations lately on this idea of joy vs. suffering. i'm not really ready to blog about it yet, but i will. i just know that no matter what experiences i should expect to go through as i 'align with christ' and 'die to self', hope still remains. i don't care if there can be suffering without joy or joy without long as i have hope. that's all i need...


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