girl growing

and a space for her to play in

Sunday, February 11, 2007

my coordinates

there are times when i have so many things to write...
this is one of those times.
i just got done watching the grammys...
and i'm tremendously happy for the dixie chicks.
i'm not a total fan of country music,
but those girls have guts,
and i like that.
my increasingly conservative and republican mother, on the other hand,
does not like them and was not too happy with their winnings...
she's cute.
lent is coming up...
and i'm pretty much decided on what i'll be giving up:
radio/music/noise in my car.
i always complain about never having silence,
and i figure this will be a good excuse to try it out.
(so much silence this month...goodness)
and i'm also trying to figure out what our little community can do during the upcoming weeks to prepare for the lenten season.
eat our hearts out on tuesday?
try out the ashes on wednesday?
then later, wash each others feet on thursday?
do a tenebrae or stations of the cross on friday?
do an easter vigil the weekend of easter?
perhaps my very liturgically affluent friend mark can help me ;)
i'm also preparing for my visit to the convent over spring break.
the more i watch peoples' reactions when they find out,
the more nervous i'm getting.
am i really that big of a talker?
will this really be that arduous?
we shall see.
i'm finishing up tony jones' the sacred way that my buddy rodney lent me.
i totally dig it.
i'm going through and seeing just how many of these activities and meditations i can fit into my four days in silence.
i'm reading dark night of the soul,
a book on christian mystics,
and all the material i never really read from my hermeneutics class.
i think i'll drink lots of tea as well.
ryan and i got to visit a buddhist temple the other day and i found their tea soothing and calming.
those buddhists have so many things right that we christians are missing,
and i'd like to implement some of the other religions' practices into
i also want to pick up a prayer rope,
try to actually use the rosary that usually dangles 'round my neck,
attempt the jesus prayer and centering prayer,
play with the daily office,
go through the beautiful stations of the cross the villa has set up,
fast a little,
probably cry a lot,
and perhaps even pray.
it's been a long time since i've actually truly, honestly prayed.
and i really want to not plan this,
well, i want to not control it,
which will probably be the hardest thing i've ever done.
so...if any of you think of anything that may be interesting or helpful for me to look at,
i'd love to hear it.
i've also decided to write a book.
well, really i want to compile one.
i've begun asking my little community to write down their story with wellspring thus far.
even if it never gets published or never gets read,
we'll have it,
and that makes me happy.
yes, i am happy.
i am in a happy place right now,
and i'm feeling a little less alone...
despite the fact that i'm still wondering about a lot of things revolving around God.
sight is becoming clearer,
and the future a little less scary.
so...cheers to that i guess.


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